I was getting to the point lately where I was beginning to feel stale. It seemed almost like God had better things to do lately than to worry about me. I hate that feeling. As the summer has come, I’ve now started summer school, taking Thermodynamics (for the third time. . . bummer right?). I also decided I was going to live this summer with intentionality. I was going to get in shape, meet some new people, and see where God took me along the way. It was going to be my ‘summer of George!’ I even decided to make a writing schedule and see if anything amazing could come out of that.
Well, it turns out after the first week of summer classes, I’ve been lazy. I get home from class, and tell myself I’m gonna sit around and play PS3 for an hour or so, and then get to work. And that hour turns into 4 hours, and the day is wasted. I need to work on that, and I got some encouragement today. I was just finishing up reading “A Million Miles in a Thousand Years” by Donald Miller, and one of the last chapters was him talking about how hard it is to get into the mood to be productive. He said that to him, writing is never fun, it’s more of a chore, and he has to remind himself constantly of the proverbs stating poverty goes to the sloth. I needed that. I was starting to feel pretty slothlike, and it always helps to know that other people struggle with the same things I do. It lets me know I’m not a freak or anything, I guess.
Anyways, so after reading that and being re-vamped for the summer of intentionality, I was reading out of John, and the story where Jesus feeds 5000 men (not including women and children) with five loaves and two fish, and I realized I’m not letting God do all He can in me. I realized that I’m like the five loaves and two fish in this story: not even close to enough on my own to feed 5000+ people, and I realized I need to work on surrendering all of it to God. By myself, I’ll always fall short of my potential, and with God I can feed 5000+ and pick up 12 baskets of leftovers afterwards. I need to give it away and let God do what He does, and maybe someday I can reach my God-given potential in life.
We all need to realize that alone we’re just enough to feed a family. We need to realize that with God, we can feed way over 5000 people, and we’ll have so much left over that we won’t even know what to do with our extra bread but save it for another day and another opportunity. I’ll be praying this week for intentionality and for guidance; I’ll be praying that God uses me to feed more than I ever could have dreamed possible, and I trust that God will follow through with me, and he will with you too if you let him.